Several of these choices have taken me some time to decide on, but this one was a given from the moment I saw the title.

My Father and I didn’t have a whole heck of a lot in common. He was raised on a farm and wore cowboy boots even if he had shorts on. He spent his entire life working with his hands. He served in the military. His favorite author was Louis Lamour. He was a good old boy in every sense of the word.

Obviously, this is not me.

Given all that, it’s probably pretty obvious that he was a big fan of Country music. I, for the record, am not. There are artists from that genre who I admire a great deal though, and one artist who I shared a love with my Father for was Johnny Cash.

I first heard this song several years after my Father passed away, and the minute I did it instantly became “his” song in my mind. As a Nine Inch Nails fan, it seemed to perfectly bridge the gap between our two worlds. Not only that, but the message of the song itself strongly resonates with the demons my Father dealt with in his life (He was an alcoholic and only sobered up for real in his last few years).

Most of the time when I hear this song I am overcome by sadness as I remember my Father and wish he were still here. He never got to see me perform on stage, and my son hardly remembers him. He was, despite his many flaws, a good man. A decent man who made a lot of mistakes but really made an effort to try and make up for them.

I miss him.

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I think about this song a lot.

I have a good life, and I don’t want to ever give the impression that I do not. I have a wonderful son, a wonderful other half, a home, and a good job. I act on a fairly regular basis, and I’m moderately active in social networking circles. I’ve got it pretty good.

I am, however, acutely aware of the missed opportunities in my life. Two things, in particular. I am aware of how much damage I did to my body by not making the conscious choice to be healthy until my late twenties, and of how I pissed away the opportunity to actually go to college full time. More so than my weight, the fact that I did not take my education seriously until it was far too late for me to devote all of my energy to it is a constant source of shame and sadness for me.

I had a taste of what is described in this song. One small, fleeting moment in my life that I can still remember vividly to this day. Six months that I absolutely pissed away and which I describe as being miserably lonely, and yet I can recall countless moments from that time period that still make me smile to this day.

Such as…

The first day of orientation and how excited and nervous I was. Sitting in the Student Hall surrounded by other students like myself and feeling all of that energy in the room.

Sharing a cigarette with my English professor on the steps of the building our class was in and realizing that we were sitting right next to the spot where George Wallace protested the integration of the University of Alabama.

The first time I went to the gamers meeting and realizing that I wasn’t the only geek on campus.

Seeing comedian Henry Cho at the campus nightclub, and how he was having so much fun just telling us stories about his college days that he went about an hour over when he was supposed to finish.

Spending my Sundays with old family friends at their home outside of Tuscaloosa watching the Buccaneers play.

The absolute stunning beauty of the campus at the University of Alabama.

The parade of honking cars that snaked all over campus the night we beat the Auburn.

Hanging out with my Hall Monitor and thinking that the math he was studying was something I’d never even come close to comprehending.

Watching Twin Peaks in the basement of Mann Hall, the residence hall on campus that didn’t have monitors because you basically had to be a MENSA member to get in. As a result it was the place where you could score the best drugs and there was ALWAYS some kind of party going on.

I could go on, but I need to get ready to go to work and as much as I am enjoying this trip down memory lane there’s nothing I can do to get these experiences back. That’s why this song makes me sad. If I had simply done the bare minimum…just put out SOME kind of effort…I could have had four or more years to build these kind of memories. I am, alas, stuck with a mere six months.

More than some people get for sure, but not nearly enough by far.

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While there are a lot of songs that make me happy, the Pet Shop Boys are guaranteed to do so with their song “I Wouldn’t Normally Do This Kind Of Thing.” I can’t put a finger on exactly why, to be honest. I mean there are a lot of reasons so it’s hard to give a specific one. It reminds me of the time we used to spend going to Tracks back in the early 90′s. It has a pretty positive message. It’s bouncy. It’s great to dance to. All of that, and I just have a weakness for this kind of pop music.

Regardless of the reason, this song is virtually guaranteed to get me to smile and dance around like a fool.

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Wow.

I think this is even harder than my favorite song. I mean, I really like music. It’s hard for me not to be able to find something redeemable about a song that I hear, ya know? I’m sure there is also a lot of music out there I’d hate that I just don’t listen to, or that I turn off as soon as I hear it (thus guaranteeing that I have no idea what the song is to tell you that it’s my least favorite).

So. Let me think. My least favorite song should be a song I know that evokes a negative emotion.

OH! I got it!

Trace Adkins. “Honkey Tonk Badonkadonk.”

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So…My friend Heather has been doing this here list for a few weeks now. I have to admit that I’m a lot like her in that this is likely not going to be done in anything remotely resembling 30 days, but it does give me some quick fodder to actually put some content out on the site.

The whole point is that you have this list of 30 different music based topics you’re supposed to write about. Day 1, for example, is your favorite song.

I hate this question. With a passion. I don’t know that I have a favorite song. I have favorite songs of the moment. When you ask me what my favorite song is the answer that comes to mind wouldn’t be the same answer I’d have given you six months ago, and it probably won’t be the same answer six months from now. So telling you what my “favorite” song is becomes kind of a problem.

That said…

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If you’re looking for a well informed and almost guaranteed to be amusing live blog of the final episode (possibly ever) of Heroes you might want to go check out Topless Robot. He’s been doing the whole live blog thing for a while and I’m pretty much just ripping off his gig by doing this.

Thing is, I’m sick as hell and I’ve spent four hours today watching this wretched wreck of a season and I’m feeling snarky. I’m likely to want to bitch quite a bit as I watch the final episode tonight but I figured I’d do it here to prevent spoiling it (and boring the shit out of my followers who don’t care).

If you care, the details are behind the cut.

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I have no desire to see the movie Avatar.

I realize that, in some ways, I have just committed some kind of sin that shall get me ostracized from geek subculture, but the statement is true. I’m just not interested. I fully admit that the film looks to be a special effects bonanza. James Cameron has never failed to deliver in that particular regard, and some of the films from his body of work are all-time, and often quoted, favorites of mine (especially Terminator and Aliens). Cameron also directed another film that I saw in the theater called Titanic. In fact, I saw it in the theater three times. That little blockbuster of a film broke all kinds of records and got a whole bunch of Academy Award nominations.

I can’t watch it today.

I mean, I could…but I can think of a lot of things I’d rather do with my time. Things like, I dunno…cleaning my ears. Checking my cat for worms. I think you get my point.

The reason I feel that way about the film is because I feel like Titanic was, ultimately, a rip-off. Cameron made sweet, sweet love to our eyeballs for a few hours and did so in a mind blowing fashion but the next morning he was gone and he left a note on the bathroom window saying that we might want to call our doctor and get checked for STD’s. Titanic had the potential to be a movie that would stand the test of time, and the fact that he created a bogus story to tell on top of the tragedy that was the Titanic is, in some ways, a bit insulting to those who died that day if you really think about it. It’s pretty much a statement that, of all of their stories, none of them were good enough to get people to come to the theater and watch a movie. Not really a valid statement when he had Kathy Bates playing “the unsinkable” Molly Brown.

Now I know a lot of you might look at the fact that I saw Titanic in the theaters three times and say “Well, you obviously enjoyed yourself when you went to see it.” You’d be 100% correct. I did. I cannot argue that fact, and I’m not ashamed to admit that I thought it was an awesome film at the time.

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I have to be honest with you.  The title of my post here is pretty much a bait-and-switch.  I don’t think Capitalism sucks.  At all.  I love making money.  Money is good.  Money lets me buy stuff, and I like having stuff.  Money lets me do things like take my son to GenCon or join thousands of insane geeks like myself for Dragon*Con in Atlanta.  Money lets me purchase memberships to Dungeons and Dragons Insider and spend hours upon hours trying to re-capture my childhood.  I’m a materialistic fool who doesn’t wanna share and capitalism is the way to go for me.

That being said, there are things about Capitalism that make me very sad in our current times.  Some of that, of course, focuses around the health care debate.  This post is NOT about the health care debate, but I feel this is worth mentioning at least in passing.  As much as I think he does more harm than good in regards to being the public face of liberalism, I do have to agree with Bill Maher when he says that there are certain things that simply should not be profit driven.  Health care is one of those things.  A system in which you are worth more if you are sick and dying is a broken system.

But, no.  This post is not about health care.  This post is really about something that has a much bigger impact on my daily life.

This post is about the internet and about how a bunch of greedy, lazy people are fucking it up.

I make no secret about the fact that one of the main reasons I started ShrinkGeek was to make money.  Allow me to re-direct you to the opening paragraph of this post.  I like money, and the idea of making money while helping people and writing is just delicious to me.  The thing is, we made a commitment when we put ShrinkGeek together that we weren’t going to sell our souls in order to turn a profit.  We want people to click on our advertisements.  We want people to click on our affiliate links.  We want to be attractive to advertisers so they give us lots of money to put their banners up on our site.  We’re not going to get there, though, by tricking people.  We’re genuinely trying to offer a valuable service to our readers.  We’re not doing article swaps or posting fake reviews that are supplied to us by PR firms.  We’re not using automated programs to get thousands of followers on our Twitter account.  We’re not trying to game the system.

As a result we’re also not making much money at this point, and there is frankly no guarantee we’ll ever end up doing so before we decide the effort is not worth the investment.

What has me thinking about this recently is the absolute proliferation of bots and marketers on Twitter.  It’s getting to the point where it is difficult to sift through the noise in order to decipher the signal, and that depresses me.  Twitter is an amazing tool, but at the rate the garbage is filling the stream it isn’t going to be long before people who genuinely want to use the service to connect with others are going to move on and all you’re going to have left are people who are trying to sell you something.  The same thing is happening with a lot of blogs these days.  What started as a genuine movement is rapidly devolving into everyone and their brother attempting to get rich quick by either recycling content that was written by someone else or tricking Google to visit your web site instead of Amazon.com.

And I get it…I really do.  I get the desire to make money without doing any real work.  I’d love to get rich for doing next to nothing.  I really would.  But on the flip side it makes me really, really sad to see so much potential in the form of communication getting lost in a sea of…shit.  There really isn’t any other way to put it.  The internet is becoming more and more polluted, and eventually I fear we’re going to get to a point where the only way you’re able to find real content is by paying a third party to filter through the shit for you.

Premium internet – where nothing of quality is available unless you’re paying for it.

Maybe that’s the plan.  I know the big media companies would really love for all of us to be paying to get to their content.  All I know is that more and more it seems like Twitter, in particular, is predominantly dominated by a bunch of Marketers trying to sell Marketing techniques to…well..other Marketers.  They aren’t offering anything new at all, but instead continue to re-package the same “10 sure fire ways to make money on the internet” and sell them to someone else, who is just going to try and re-package that information and try to sell it to someone else.  In the mean time these people set up spam bots trying to trick folks into clicking their links and start to scare away some of the people who are genuinely trying to use Twitter as a means of building networks and/or communicating with their Fan Base (folks like Wil Wheaton and Felicia Day, both of whom have complained about this recently).

I see so much potential out there.  We’re standing on the brink of a revolution that has the potential to fundamentally change the way we look at entertainment and information, but that potential is being watered down by sloth and greed.

I know that there is this ideal image of capitalism in which people who work hard and have good ideas are rewarded financially for that, but I don’t see that happening so much these days – especially when it comes to the internet.  That is why, in this regard, I kinda think capitalism sucks.

HeroesWhile I’m not as ass-deep in the story as I was during Season One I’m still watching Heroes regularly.  I may not catch it when it’s first on the air but I’m usually caught up within a week thanks to either the DVR or Hulu.com.  Last night I actually managed to catch the final episode of season three right after it went off the air (because watching it on the DVR keeps me from having to watch commercials, naturally).  That being the case, I wanted to jot down some thoughts I have on the series so far, the resolution of season three, and where the series might go from here.

Beware the cut tag, for there be spoilers below!

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