Apr 272010
 

One of my former High School classmates recently posted a note on her Facebook page that was titled “A Lot Of Truth Here.” The post was a laundry lists of “truths” about Liberals vs. Conservatives, and it was clearly written by someone who sympathized with the Right side of that particular battle.

I didn’t respond in depth to that particular post. For one it was pretty clear that she agreed with it and nothing I could say was going to convince her otherwise. Two, she very clearly didn’t write it herself. Lastly, however, was due to the fact that the post ended with a “Oh ha-ha, this is just a joke and if it offends you clearly that means you’re a liberal and everything that is written here is true” kind of statement.

As I said to her there, it didn’t offend me. It was just wrong.

At the time I pretty much tried to leave it at that, but it has stuck with me since reading it so I’ve gone back and grabbed the post so that I can respond on my turf. My thoughts are behind the cut.

[Note : The contents of the original post are italicized below]

If you ever wondered what side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!

If a conservative doesn’t like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
If a liberal doesn’t like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

I do not like guns, and I believe our society is dangerously preoccupied with them. That said, I have no problem whatsoever with responsible gun ownership. I want our existing gun laws to be enforced. I want the gun show loophole closed. I want our government to continue to ban weapons that have no reasonable practical use outside of killing many people in a short amount of time.

If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat..
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

I was a vegetarian for a while. I just wanted there to be a Taco Bell in the city I was living in. There wasn’t, and it made me sad. Really, this has got to be one of the most asinine statements in this entire message. Not even PETA, arguably one of the most outspoken organizations who support vegetarian lifestyles, campaigns for meat consumption to be illegal.

If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

You cannot legislate respect. The fact that you are married and cannot be fired from your job for being a heterosexual does not make me respect you. Having a spouse does not make you any less of an asshole. Respect is earned. What we are demanding is equal protection and consideration under the law for all Americans.

You know what I love the most about this one? The fact that it assumes that a conservative homosexual just quietly “leads his life” and doesn’t demand equal protection under the law. The best part about this statement is that ignores the fact that one of the co-sponsors of the recent Conservative Political Action Conference (that had a keynote speech by the one and only Glenn Beck) was a group of Conservative homosexuals known as  GOProud.org. These folks are pushing for the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and believe that “Defending the Constitution” means “opposing any anti-gay federal marriage amendment.”

Doesn’t sound like they are just quietly leading their lives to me.

If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.

I have to admit that this is the one that normally irks me the most. This misconception that liberals are lazy and do not want to work. Some of the hardest working people I know are liberals. Many of them have multiple jobs. I, personally, have worked consistently for the last 20 years (with, perhaps, a six month total period of unemployment between various jobs). I was on government assistance for a brief period, but I got off of it as soon as I could. I am doing my best to save for retirement. There was a period several years ago when I was seriously “down and out” and almost lost my home, but I took on a series of roommates to make ends meet.

I do not believe that anyone is going to take care of me but me, and I honestly cannot think of a single Liberal friend of mine who feels differently.

If a conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don’t like be shut down.

I support the boycott of advertisers that sponsor talk show hosts whom I do not agree with. If those businesses want my money I demand they stop supporting what I consider to be dangerous untruths. If the efforts of people who join in those boycotts gets those talk show hosts taken off the air, I will be happy. I do not, nor have I ever, supported the government stepping in to “shut down” a talk show host.

Neither, does that matter, President Barack Obama. He has stated on multiple occasions that he believes that the Fairness Doctrine is a distraction and that he does not support it being brought up again (as reported last February by Fox News).

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.
A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced.
(Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)

I believe that individuals should be free to practice their religion, as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else. That being said, I believe that I should be free to not have any particular religion forced upon me. As such, I believe that the line between Church and State should be clear.

If you believe that my desire not to be subjected to prayer if I wish to attend a government function equates to your religion being silenced I’m afraid I cannot help you. That said, if I came to visit your church I’d never dream of asking you not to pray.

There’s a time and a place for everything.

If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.

So…wait…

There’s no Conservatives on Medicaid or Medicare?

None?

Wow.

I have health insurance. I want to keep my health insurance. I do not want anyone else to pay for my health care costs. Regardless of those facts, I  support legislation that will provide access to affordable health insurance for all Americans.

If a conservative reads this, he’ll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh.
A liberal will delete it because he’s “offended”.

Well, I forwarded it to you.

Yeah, there’s that kicker at the end. Liberals clearly have no sense of humor. As I said in my original reply to this, I am not offended by it. I am saddened. It bothers me that there are people out there who actually think that everything written here is 100% factual. Yes, I’m sure there are individuals out there who would fit the picture of liberals that is drawn above, but there aren’t many of them.

Oh well.

Even writing this is tilting at windmills. I realize that. This stuff just makes me so…sad.

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  9 Responses to “Gross Generalizations (Not A Lot Of Truth Here)”

  1. You are not alone, Mike.

  2. Well answered, Mike. Sad indeed.

  3. Goddamned right. Amen. Hallelujah and all of that. I’mma gonna repost, it’s so money.

  4. “If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.”

    I got to say, the most conservative person I know always has his hand out. It’s ridiculous. He even asked me to pay him for the food stamps he was getting so he’d have enough gas to put in his car. I (obviously) declined, and felt creepy that he’d even ask, much less want to commit fraud like that.

    I don’t like full blown liberals, and I don’t like full blown conservatives. They are both hypocrities about something, and they love to point fingers at the others.

  5. PS–

    I said “I don’t like full blown liberals, and I don’t like full blown conservatives. They are both hypocrities about something, and they love to point fingers at the others.”

    Not to say I dislike them personally, I just don’t talk politics because either side often drives me cray-cray.

  6. I wonder why I never see liberals circulating this kind of smug, pointless, reductionistic, untruthful BS about conservatives. Maybe it’s because we’re too busy using our critical thinking skills and educating ourselves about what’s actually going on instead of recycling tired stereotypes about the opposition.

    • It’s rampant amongst the talking heads of the media to put forth opinion as a statement of fact. I dislike piling on (actually, I do in this case), but Fox News has some who are famous for doing that. Problem is, once you confront this mindset with facts, you’re quickly branded as unamerican, unethical, evil, commie, or anything else in the realm of name-calling. Politics has become uncivilized, and I fear we are just a step or two away from throwing eggs or having fist fights in Congress. Intelligent discourse is lost, and it may not come back for a very long time…if ever.

  7. My dad forwarded crap like this to me for ages. He finally got enough of a rise out of me that I responded.

    For the most part, I now only get kittens and puppies in my e-mail from him.

    I can share what he sent me, and my response, if you care to read it. Though my response was mostly a blog copy-paste, because I didn’t have the knowledge myself to make the argument against Our Lord and Savior Wal-Mart that needed to be made.

  8. What a bunch of crap! Hrm, how can I shatter the stereotypes??

    I’m a liberal. I own a gun. I support the right to own guns.

    I’m a liberal and a vegetarian. I could give a crap what YOU eat, this is my choice.

    When I was down and out, I worked my ass off at crappy part-time retail jobs.

    I don’t like conservative talk-show hosts. I change the channel.

    I’m a liberal, and a devout atheist, and I could give a flying rat’s crap what you believe in.

    I’m a liberal, I DON’T have a job that provides health care, and I pay for my own at a very high rate. I don’t expect anyone to provide it for me gratis.

    This is the typical drivel you expect from believe who believe just a little too much in their own hype. I don’t care what your political persuasion is, this kind of stereotyping just makes the problem worse. If you actually believe this crap and posted it, you’re an idiot.

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