Quick Update – Good thoughts requested

Just got home from the ER. K. bolted out of here and drove herself there around 10:00 PM last night in excruciating pain. I didn’t even have a chance to put my shoes on before she was gone. I finally caught up with her at the hospital, where she was in so much pain she could hardly stand there to fill out the paperwork.

They finally got her on pain medications, and she calmed down a bit. After a series of tests, they determined that her gall bladder was “very sick” and was going to need to be removed. This will be happening in the next day or so.

She is very scared right now, as she has never had any kind of surgery. Once I find out if she is up for receiving calls I will post contact information. Until that time, keep her in your thoughts.

I’m going to go try to get some sleep now.

Bzzreport – Storyville Coffee

Ok, so a little background here. netgoth recently signed up on a website called Bzzagent. The whole premise behind the service is that they send you free stuff, and after you’re done checking out the free stuff you tell all your friends about it. I actually heard about this kind of thing a few weeks ago on NPR, and I thought it was a pretty good idea. They don’t want you to be disingenuous about why you’re talking up stuff that they send you, nor do they want you to lie about something you didn’t like. They are just trying to take advantage of “viral” marketing strategies, and I for one think it’s pretty bloody brilliant.

Why, might you ask, am I now writing about this?

Well, one of the products that she’s received as part of joining this service is a sampling of coffee from Storyville. She did so for me, because quite frankly she’s not a coffee drinker. I, on the other hand, drink it all day long. Loves me some coffee. So the prospect of some free, fresh coffee was pretty damned enticing.

I’m impressed.

Ok, first of all they send you your initial order in a really nicely packaged box with instructions on how to brew the coffee and a DVD for those who don’t like to read. The coffee itself has a roasting date on it (in this case, the roasting date was Tuesday, so the coffee was only 2 days “old”). They recommend using the beans within 12 days of the roasting date for maximum flavor, and using a french press for the actual brewing.

These folks are pretty damned serious about their coffee.

After opening the package, K. asked me if I had already brewed it from the next room. No, I had not. It had not been brewed or ground yet, but the scent filled the house anyway. Potent, indeed!

I followed the directions as closely as I could, waited the four minutes required to properly brew it, and sampled my coffee.

It was pretty damned good. It’s strong stuff, sure, and it has a bit of an aftertaste – but it’s not that bitter, burnt aftertaste at all. It’s pleasant. K. was curious, and took a sip of mine. She looked at me and said “I could drink this coffee,” so I made her a cup as well. Without having to absolutely drown it in cream and sugar, she drank the whole thing – and enjoyed it.

If I keep getting this stuff I might not be the only coffee drinker around here.

As with most premium things, you get what you pay for from these folks. A pound of coffee is about $16, and you have to tack another $4 on for shipping and handling. The local Barnies sells a pound of coffee for $13, so it’s about 50% more expensive. Considering our current budget constraints, I can’t see any likelihood of me completely moving over to this kind of coffee for all of my caffeine needs, but it’s definitely a treat I plan on giving myself on occasion. If you really like good coffee, and have a french press, I’d suggest you give these folks a shot. You won’t be disappointed at all. (If any of you on my list are coming to dinner on Saturday and joining us after at my place, I’d be happy to brew you up a cup…if there’s any left, that is).

Edit – If you check out Bzzagent and decide to sign up, do us a favor and list Netgoth as the person who suggested you try out the site. Thanks!

"Please don't cheer for me"

I think I understand now why so many parents refuse to let their children participate in team sports. It’s not just that they don’t want to see them get hurt, although that’s certainly a factor. It’s not just the cost, from the financial perspective or the amount of time you have to invest, but that’s a factor as well. No, I think the real reason that many parents don’t put their kids into team sports is because they don’t want to see them fail.

It’s hard. I think, in the grand scheme of things, it’s the hardest thing I’ve had to come to grips with as a parent.

Most of you know that my kid is pretty damned talented. Yes, I realize that bragging on your kid is quite the thing to do, and even adding the “but in his case it’s true” is cliche and tired as well, but..well..in his case it’s true. Academically, he’s consistently at the top of his class. He just took a reading assessment test and the results said that his reading comprehension is at college levels. He’s gotten the “Citizen of the Month” award three times. He’s on the student patrol. He’s friendly, compassionate, and bright. No, he’s not always perfect, but in many ways he’s pretty much the ideal kid.

Up until recently, he was also pretty good at baseball. When he went up to the plate, the other team would shout “big hitter” and move further back into the outfield.

Not this season.

There are three games left in the season, and he hasn’t gotten a single hit.

Not one.

To say this has been fairly devastating to him is an understatement. Every time he strikes out he comes off the field and has to fight back the tears. He’s angry and frustrated. He doesn’t understand what the problem is, and neither do we. He’s doing what the coaches tell him to. In practice, he’s executing perfectly in “soft toss” and doing well in the batting cage. When he gets to the plate, though, he just seems to choke.

As a parent, my instinct is to remove him from this situation. To protect him from that hurt and frustration. I realize, of course, this would be the absolute worst thing to do. I know the life lesson he’s learning, and it’s an important one. Instead I sit on the bleachers, and I cheer for him, and I give him a hug after the game and tell him that he did his best and not to give up. It hurts, watching him go through that, but I know that if I were to “save” him from it now it would hurt more later.

I’m supposed to prepare him for life, you see.

It’s hard, though.

Last night, it got a little harder. After striking out the first time billified (his step-father) went over to give him some pointers and calm him down. I didn’t go with. I could see very clearly he was having a hard time hiding the tears, and I know that’s embarassing for him, so I didn’t want to make him feel like a scene was being made in front of the other kids. After the next inning, before he went up again, he signaled me to come over. I thought, perhaps, he wanted a snack or a drink. When I got there, though, his eyes were still glassy. He got that very formal, “I’m trying to be an adult and rational and say something that could sound mean but isn’t voice” and asked me a favor.

“When I go up to bat, can you not cheer for me please? Not unless I get a hit. I hear you cheer and it puts extra pressure on me. Just wait until I actually get a hit, ok?”

I told him I would, trying pretty hard to hide how shocked I was but what he asked.

“That’s ok, right? You’re not mad at me?”

I assured him I was not, and told him I was proud of him for trying his best, and went back to the bleachers.

He struck out again. I stayed quiet.

I know that Alex isn’t unique in this. That there are times people don’t want encouragement. They don’t want the extra pressure of your expectations behind them when they are already afraid to fail. This isn’t some kind of unheard of phenomenon. It doesn’t make it sting any less, though, especially when you consider that the cheering was supposed to help take away the sting of failure – not make it worse.

We talked after. I encouraged him to continue trying his best, and told him that as long as he was doing so I would always be proud of him. As always, he bounced back very quickly from his frustrations on the field last night. Within minutes of getting home was playing Halo with J., carrying on as if nothing bad had happened at all.

I didn’t shake what he said off so easily. I still haven’t, obviously, or I wouldn’t be angsting so much about it today.

Yeah, this part of being a parent is hard. Watching them struggle. Watching them fail. Wost of all, being powerless to do anything about it. All the while learning that sometimes the encouragment you are trying to give them is just making it worse, and they need to do it on their own.

It was a lot easier when he was a baby, I’ll tell you that much.

Life…Don't talk to me about life.

In the interest of not fading completely out of the public eye, I figured I’d take a few mintues to jot down an update here. I wish I could say there was a ton of interesting things going on, but frankly there isn’t. It’s mostly kind of blah.

We’re supposed to be having a garage sale this weekend, but I have a feeling it’s not going to happen. We’ve gone through an insane amount of crap recently, but there is still more to go through and I’m fairly certain it’s not going to get done today. As soon as I’m done with work we have to go to Weight Watchers (which should be fun…in the “bamboo under the fingernails” fashion…Halloween is truly a holiday created by the devil if you’re trying to lose weight) and class, and when we get home I’ll need to go to bed because tomorrow is an in-office day. Not to mention the fact that we haven’t advertised the garage sale, nor do we have signs to put up.

Some extra money would be good about now. Got the property tax bill today. Oy. The less said about that the better.

Had to give my sister the bad news that, in my opinion, the hard drive in her computer took a dump. I’ve tried using the Recovery Disks that came with it, I’ve tried using a straight up Windows XP disk, I’ve even tried using a Windows 98 boot disk, but no matter what I do whenever files are copied on to the hard drive as part of the install I get a corrupt file error. She’s going to go out and buy a new hard drive tonight, and hopefully I’ll be able to get it installed and running for her again this weekend. I’m also going to be giving her my old laptop at some point, so that she can have a computer to do her banking on that the kids don’t have access to.

I’ve got some auctions running on Ebay. Nothing truly spectacular, though. Just a few items I wanted to get rid of that I think will sell better there than in a garage sale. I’ve already sold one (it actually sold within a few hours of listing it), but the others so far are seeing very little activity.

In work related news, had a “holy crap” moment that required me to log an hour last night, but fortunately it wasn’t my fault. I’m not sure how bad the fallout is from the situation, but as it is something that is directly communicated to our members it may end up being a Very Bad Thing. I’ve been in a holding pattern today waiting for some files from the department in question to finish my work, but so far nothing has arrived. I’m thinking it’s not a good sign, but I could be wrong. My boss doesn’t seem too overly concerned about it, but that could just be a matter of him realizing it’s out of our hands and not stressing over things beyond his control.

I leave for New Jersey next Sunday for a week of training. Really looking forward to hooking up with some of my friends in the area. Ironically, one of them is actually going to be heading down here for vacation the same day I come home. As he’s going to be knee deep in final rehearsals for a ballet he’s doing tech for, we might not get to hook up while I’m in the area at all.

When I was talking to him about my upcoming trip, he let me know that his relationship of eight years ended in July. That was a bit of a shocker to say the least. I didn’t get many details from him about it (he wants them shared over drinks and face to face), but I can tell it was pretty hard on him. Can’t say I’m surprised. When you spend nearly 1/4 of your life with someone and have it yanked out from under you unexpectedly that tends to throw you for a loop.

Unfortunately, my trip is happening during the week that additional callbacks are happening for the remaining shows in the current Jobsite season. I also missed one due to being out of town for Dragon*Con. File these facts under “Things That Suck.”

Speaking of Jobsite, this is the final weekend for The Pillowman. I’ll be out there on Saturday night working the subscriber booth and seeing the show. From everything I’ve heard, it’s hands down one of the best productions they have ever put on. All the local newspapers gave it glowing reviews, and everyone I know who has seen it was absolutely blown away. This weekend is the final weekend, so if you’re local and you haven’t had a chance to see it I’d suggest you mosey on over to the TBPAC website and order your tickets now.

I could really, really use a deep massage right about now.

Yeah, that was kind of random.

Ah well. Back to the grind.